A lot of people say that having kids makes a couple’s relationship much stronger. The problem is, there are a lot of couples who are not able to have their own children. How do they make their relationship stronger? These ways to be happy as a childless couple may help you cope with infertility and childlessness. A childless life doesn’t mean unhappiness for all childless couples, even if they’re desperate to get pregnant.
1. Be willing to let go of how your life “should” be
Do you associate not having children with feelings of failure, being a “loser”, or feeling less worthy or fulfilled than the mom next door? The first step to accepting a childfree life is express your feelings of pain and loss. Admit that it’s painful to not have children.
Second, you have to be open to your life as it is. Instead of hating your body or wrestling with the fact that you can’t have kids, try opening your heart and mind to a life without children. You don’t have to love or be cheerful about your childfree life, but being open to your life as it is will help you accept the hand you’ve been dealt.
2. Remember that everyone deals with different problems
If want to be happy without having children, remember that infertility is a condition that you’re unfortunate enough to have…and we all have stuff. Knowing that you’re not alone in the pain that life brings helps you accept a childfree life.
3. Surround yourself with childfree couples
You can spend time with friends who have kids – but you will mostly enjoy friends who don’t have children, or who have grown children! If it hurts you to spend time with pregnant friends or big families, then reduce those visits. We wouldn’t advise avoiding families altogether, but we think accepting a childfree life is easier when you’re with people in the same situation.
Another thing that can help you be happy without children is getting a dog. Having a dog will give you happiness, and it’s like having a child of your own as well.
4. Accept that you may experience sadness or disappointment every day
Getting and staying emotionally healthy is a daily choice. Accepting your childfree life and being happy without having children is something you have to decide to do — perhaps every hour! Being okay with your life doesn’t happen overnight. And, feelings of acceptance don’t last forever. It’s like showering or eating; you have to do it every day. Sometimes three times a day!
To be happy without having children, you have to remember that happiness is a daily choice.
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